In Dreams

I had a dream. I was walking through the zoo trying to find my mom. I was a little girl again, but...not. You know dream logic. The zoo was full of people, but no animals. So many people there that I couldn't find my mom. I kept on catches glimpses of her around the corner, but I could never find her.

But I found Derek. He tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Tag, you're it, Karen."

"I'm not Karen," I said.

"Make up your mind then," he said. "I remember back when all you wanted was to be called Karen. Blah blah blah don't call me Grace."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You don't remember?" He laughed and I shivered. "You loved that stupid horror movie. It scared you out of your wits, but you insisted on watching it every time it came on."

I looked around and noticed that there weren't any people around anymore. "Where's Mom?" I asked.

"Where she always is," Derek said. "In the ground, pushing up daisies."

"She was here, I saw her." I turned around and Derek was gone as well. "Derek?" I turned around again and there was my dad, standing inside one of the cages. "Dad? Do you know where Derek went?"

"He's in here, too," Dad said. "Somewhere. Don't worry, my little Judy. I always loved you more."

"I'm not Judy," I said. "I'm Grace."

"Judy, Grace, Karen," he said. "You had so many friends. You were never lonely growing up." He looked at me with wrinkled face and I suddenly remembered scattering his ashes in the ocean and how I wanted to cry but couldn't.

"Dad," I asked, "where's Mom?"

His smile faded. "She's not here," he said. "It's not her." I heard footsteps behind me and I turned again and there she was. My mom. Same faded dress she always wore, same hairstyle, but I couldn't see her face. She was wearing a wooden mask. "Don't go with her," my father whispered.

My mother went to lift the mask from her face and then I woke up.

I don't know why I'm telling this. I just felt the need to write it all down.

sparse.

Wandering in Graceland

I'm probably going to talk to Derek soon. I wish I had something to tell him. I wish I could tell him I knew where he is or where my next step is. I wish I could tell him everything is going to be alright.

But I can't.

I wandered around Graceland today, just looking at everything, trying to see if there were any more clues. There weren't. Nothing except Elvis memorabilia, which looked as fake as the Oz memorabilia back in Kansas.

I want to stay awake. I don't want to sleep. I fell asleep once and dreamed I was in the sky falling. I was falling so fast I thought when I hit the ground I would be shattered into a million pieces. I don't even remember hitting the ground in my dream, I just woke up.

I don't know what Neville (or the Vagabond, or whatever his name was) was talking about. I don't know anything. I don't know what I'm doing.

Technicolor Dreams

The Misfits are leaving more and more cryptic clues. A video that spells out "museum" in Braille. An anagram of "technicolor dreams."

I had a dream. Last night. I went to sleep in the motel and dreamt I was in the middle of Moon Lake again. I was alone in the boat and still water surrounded me. Karen's diary was in my hand and I opened it up, but I couldn't read any of the words (which should have clued me in to this being a dream, since you can't read in dreams). I let the book go and it was pulled away by the wind. I looked above the lake and saw a giant funnel cloud coming downwards waiting to pull me up. I tried holding onto the boat, but it was no help. The funnel cloud came towards me, outstretching itself like fingers, like it was a giant hand waiting to grab me and pull me into the sky.

And that's all I remember. I don't know why I'm writing it down. I just have to write something or I'll go crazy. What museum should I go to? And what does this have to do with "Ow Game"?

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